Give Her Weird Music
Hi, everybody. I'm going to be taking over the bulk of the responsibility for Treasure Box for as long as my new colleagues here at Mosaic Minds will have me. Unlike my predecessor, I don't feel up to producing two columns per issue, so "No Rock and Roll Fun" and "Treasure Box" are being collapsed into one. The title was too good to throw away, and I hope that all our readers will find some amusement in the musical treasures that I share.
As you'll probably find out, I listen to a lot of different kinds of music. Unless something has hateful or excessively insipid lyrics--or I'm too tin-eared to appreciate it (like a lot of instrumental jazz)--I'll probably listen to it.
Now that the preliminaries are out of the way, let's move to this issue's column: weird music. In my musical adventuring I have run across some true oddities.
I'd like to point out in advance that I like all of these songs a lot, with the possible exception of "Mommy Can I Still Call Him Daddy?", which is upsettting. I mean no disrespect to any of the musicians. Weird is not necessarily bad.
And now, the hit parade of the bizarre.
1. "Whip It" by Devo, and later, by the Del Rubio Triplets.
I've got to thank my friend Julie for alerting me to the Del Rubio Triplets' cover of this song.
I think most of us are familiar with the original "Whip It," which was, itself, just odd, despite containing some pretty good advice. ("When a problem comes along, you must whip it! Before the cream sets out too long, you must whip it!") Even if there hadn't been the accompanying video where the members of Devo wore Legos on their heads, it would have been a weird song.
Now, imagine three ladies strumming madly on acoustic guitars while singing "Whip It" in enthustiastic and, at times, sultry voices. It might not be radio-friendly, but, like the original, it can steer a person like me away from a nervous breakdown with the sheer power of its goofiness.
2. "Mommy Can I Still Call Him Daddy?" by Dottie West
I love Dottie West. If I ever have another break-up, I hope I will celebrate by listening repeatedly to "Lesson In Leavin'" while drinking beer.
That said, "Mommy ... " is one of the most peculiar songs I have ever heard.
Ms. West's part is a textbook example of what not to say to your son when his father bails. It's about how he mustn't cry, how it's time to be Mommy's brave little man, and how he might as well forget about Dad, because Dad doesn't love him "like before."
The little boy's part is what lifts this song into the realm of the weird. Belted out with a thick country accent and a creepy intensity, it goes:
"Please, Mommy, can I still call him Daddy? I know he's treated us so bad
Please, Mommy, can I still call him Daddy for he's the only daddy I ever had."
3. "Little Fishies" by the Chainsaw Kittens
This masterpiece of weirdness can be found on the Kittens' Angel on the Range album, from the days when frontman Tyson Todd Meade still dressed like a bargain-basement transvestite. It is about the length of your average pop song, bouncy and melodic, and its lyrics are composed exclusively of the couplet "Little fishies, little fishies gotta go away / Little fishies, little fishies gotta go away today," sung with joyful exuberance.
I will not speculate here about the amount of illegal substances that might or might not have contributed to the composition and recording of "Little Fishies." After all, I can be goofy enough when I'm stone cold sober.
4. "Sam Hill" by Merle Haggard
I'm told that Merle was not particularly keen on recording "Sam Hill."
It shows.
For me, it is the misery and loathing in every note and every syllable of the Hag's performance that makes "Sam Hill" a classic. I can just see the scowl on his face, and the record execs standing outside the recording booth, ready to tear up his record contract if he doesn't cooperate.
The female backup singers take "Sam Hill" over the top into total weirdness. Much like the lady singers on the theme from Shaft, they punctuate Merle's grimacing delivery with high-pitched comments, such as, "What?!?" They seem to have been enjoying the performance more than the Hag was.
In defense of all these tunes, I must say that despite their profound oddness, I still find them far less bizarre than most of the pornographic "love" songs that I've heard on modern radio. If pottymouth advances about taking girls' clothes off are what makes a modern courtship, I'd better start dating men old enough to be my father, and hope that they've been living in a time warp that reflects a more chivalrous era.
I wonder if Mark Mothersbaugh, formerly of Devo, is married....