Youth's Mecca: Astoria, Oregon

by Carrie Pålsson

Every day after school it was the same. Rush in the door, grab some cookies and milk, pop in the special pirated tape we'd made and sit back and relax. Mind you, this was the same tape every single day. The same tape. The same two movies.

"Hey you guuuuuuyyyysssss!!!" we'd shout with Sloth, cheering as he slid down the bedraggled sail of One-Eyed Willy's lost ship.

Yup. My sister and I were the ultimate Goonies fans. Goonies were good enough for us and probably for every other child of the 80s. My parents didn't understand. They threatened to burn the tape (which also included The Legend of Billie Jean) many times but it never happened. We were too addicted.

Fast forward 15 years.

I was a new teacher looking for a job. Any job. Despite the overall state-wide teacher shortage, the English departments all seemed to be full and uninterested in a first-year teacher with very little experience. I searched high and low, online and off. I sent in applications everywhere.

Then I got the call. Astoria, Oregon was looking for a teacher and they wanted to interview me. Astoria? I'd never been there, but the name was familiar. I told my sister and she knew the name right away. "You're going to live with the Goonies!"

I was astounded. Could there be anything cooler than living in the town where pirate treasure had been found? Absolutely not.

I got the job and quickly learned there was more to Astoria than the legend of the Goonies. There was also Kindergarten Cop, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III, Short Circuit and one of the Free Willy movies. My first apartment was right next door to the school Arnold had taught at. I occasionally hung out with the fire chief from the movie. My friends' favorite hang out had been the hide-away of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The bridge from Short Circuit graced the skyline of the city, causing me incredible anxiety every time we had to cross it in driver's education.

Somehow I had landed a job in an 80s mecca. Every step I took seemed familiar, mainly because I'd seen characters on the big screen take the same steps.

I wasn't the only one who felt this way about the little town Astoria. I'd meet tourists all the time and the ones my age often showed more excitement about being in the "Goonie town" than they did about touring the notoriously chilly coast of the Pacific Northwest..

Of course, being known as the "Goonie town" is a lot more fun than being a little peninsula sticking out of the Columbia River. There's a reason Oregonians are known as "ducks"--it rains constantly. I don't know how they managed to film so many movies there with the bad weather that plagues the area.

In addition to being the home of the Goonies, Astoria is home to many friendly people. Somehow the coast draws a wide variety of people including loggers, fishermen, artists, actors, conservatives and liberals. The town is so small that even a shy person like me found I knew at least one person no matter where I went. People welcomed me with open arms and I loved it.

The actors and artists make the town of 10,000 people even more interesting than my current home of 60,000. In Astoria, people make things happen. There are two live theaters run by talented people who write their own plays in addition to producing more widely known works. There is also a neat old movie theater that had been re-fitted with couches instead of regular seats. The downtown area is full of cute little shops selling everything from local art to umbrellas to handmade jewelry.

The town itself is steeped in history and tradition, beginning with the end of Lewis and Clark's famous western expedition. Astoria was settled early, as evidenced by the beautiful historical homes perched on the hill of the city. The early settlers left behind a rich and colorful history that locals celebrate enthusiastically. If you've got a few minutes, ask the locals to tell you about the history of the town. You'll hear tales of old style gang warfare and stories of haunted houses. If you're lucky someone might tell you about the mystery of the wealthiest family in town, though I can't say anything more in this article since they guard their secrets with an excellent lawyer.

For something more official, visit in the summer months. Every year one theater puts on a show, teaching locals and tourists alike about the sordid past of the little fishing village first settled by Lewis and Clark.

Shanghied in Astoria always features a local cast and details the darker history of the town, albeit in a light-hearted and fun way. Luckily, no one has been shanghaied from a whorehouse in several decades, so a visit to Astoria today should be safe as long as you take an umbrella and avoid visiting September through May.

If you're looking for history, culture or natural beauty, Astoria is a great place to visit. It's also a great place to live, if you can stand the constant winter rain. Given the chance, I'd move back there in a flash. Heck, maybe I could even move into the Goonie house. The last I heard, it was a rental so who knows? Could there be anything cooler?