Voices

by Deidre Abrahamsson

How much do you want?

Just a little.

How much do you want it?

Just a little.
Obviously.
Or else.

Or else what?

Or else I would
have done it already.

It's not too late.

Oh really?
How do I know?
I don't even know where to begin.

Where do you want to be?

I want to be finished.
I want to be at the
glass-littered fields
east of the Schuylkill.
I want to be walking
awkwardly
in my
white eyelet dress,
black lace-up shoes,
feeling paralyzed with
self-consciousness and fear.
I want to hear you
laughing when you
tell me what you
really did for Xmas,
my mind numbing
before the pain
sears my heart.

Is that what you really want?

No, not really.
But maybe.
Yes maybe,
just a little.

The Author

Deirdre Abrahamsson is a New Yorker living in Gothenburg, Sweden. She received a BA in English and an MS in Education from the University of Pennsylvania. By day she writes operational plans and reports for the 2006 European Athletics Championships and by night, poems and short stories. She is currently working on a novel about love, sobriety, and New York City.