10 Tips to Kick-Start Your Self-Esteem

by Cheryl Wright

Low self-esteem manifests itself in your thoughts and behavior. You may think you have no power over low self-esteem, but the following tips provide you with a guide to activities and behaviors to help you feel better about yourself, immediately!

1. Stop comparing yourself to other people. If you play this game, you are likely to compare yourself in a negative way and set yourself up for continuing to have low self-esteem.
2. Do not keep putting yourself down. You cannot develop high self-esteem if you constantly repeat negative comments about your skills and abilities. Also, avoid focusing on "mistakes" that you have made -- learn to reframe them and look at them from the perspective of what you have learned from your experiences.
3. Use affirmations to raise your self-esteem. If you've programmed your mind to repeat negative phrases about yourself--and you see how effective that has been--then you can certainly get into the habit of continually thinking and saying positive statements about yourself to yourself.
4. Accept compliments graciously. Do not dismiss them and thereby give yourself the message that you do not deserve or are not worthy of praise.
5. Read books and listen to tapes on how to raise your self-esteem and develop a more positive attitude. The material you use becomes a subliminal message that plants itself in your mind and dominates your behavior.
6. Mix with positive and supportive people. Whom you associate with influences your thoughts and actions -- another form of subliminal learning. Negative people can put you and your ideas down and that lowers your concept of your worth. However, when you surround yourself with supportive people, you feel better about yourself, which helps to raise your self-esteem.
7. Acknowledge your positive qualities and skills. People with low self-esteem constantly put themselves down and do not appreciate their many positive attributes. What are your strengths? Play them up, and view your weaknesses as areas to improve or eliminate from your life.
8. Stop putting up with stuff. Not voicing or acknowledging your needs probably means that you are tolerating more than you should. Find the negative things that you're putting up with and refuse to tolerate them any longer. This takes work but that is what it is all about.
9. Make positive contributions to others (this does not mean that you constantly do for others what they could be doing for themselves). Making a positive contribution to others increases your sense of your own value.
10. Involve yourself in work and activities that you love. Many people with low self-esteem stop engaging in activities that they most enjoy. Even if you are not in a position to make immediate changes in your career, you can still devote some of your leisure time to enjoyable hobbies and activities.

Building good self-esteem comes from refusing to retreat and avoid challenges. Use the above tips to help you start being assertive in circumstances where your greatest strengths come into play. When you take action, regardless of the outcome, you will begin to feel better about yourself, develop your self-confidence and raise your self-esteem.

The Author

Cheryl Wright masquerades as a customer service representative from nine to five, Monday to Friday. Beneath that disguise, she is a freelance writer whose work has appeared online at writingcorner.com, changingcourse.com, simplejoy.org, dreamsalivemag.com, absolutewrite.com,and in print at The Dollar Stretcher, Trinidad Style Magazine and the Trinidad Guardian.