Military Wife

by Anna Piper

My head is filled with thoughts, tragic thoughts. They circle through over and over until they take a permanent place in my psyche and my body fills with anxiety. After all, I realize that one day I may end up alone; alone to raise my children without a father.

I sit in my cozy house, on my comfortable couch listening to my children’s laughter and still the thoughts overtake my mood. My husband is away; living sometimes on a boat, sometimes in a tent, sometimes in a hangar. He is often delivering humanitarian aid, and just as often in combat. The thought returns, what will I do? What happens if he gets injured or, heaven forbid, doesn't return alive? There is a very real prospect that he may not return.

If that happens will I be able to make do? Will I cope well? Will I help my children cope well? Will I have the courage and conviction to continue on with life? Could I work again? It’s been years since I held a job. Could I support my family? How can I possibly be assured my boys will grow up to know what an honorable, courageous, loving, fantastic man their father was? I fear that they would never know the pride and joy he has in them because I could never express it enough.

My head spins in an uncontrollable frenzy of "what if" and "could I" for months. It is finally replaced by the elation of a safe, happy and welcome homecoming only to return months later as we get ready to weather the next round of deployment. And the cycle continues.

The Author

Anna Piper is a stay-at-home mom to two wonderful boys and the proud wife of a United States Marine. They currently reside in coastal North Carolina. In her spare time she volunteers within in the military community. This is her first venture into writing.